Halloween Humor

Ghost Riddles

Halloween Humor

1. What kind of music do ghosts like?
2. Why did the ghost take his family on an elevator ride every day?
3. What do ghosts do when they want to start up a computer?
4. How did the ghost do at the comedy club?
5. What do you call a website for ghosts?
6. What is Casper’s favorite sticky treat?
7. Where do baby ghosts come from?
8. Why did the ghost go to the doctor?
9. What would you get if you crossed a cocker spaniel, a French poodle, and a ghost?
10. Who protects the shores where spirits live?
11. What did the papa ghost say to his ghostly children?
12. What is a ghost’s favorite direction?
13. Why couldn’t the ghost ride the bus?
14. Why did the ghost rush home from school?
15. Why did the police officer arrest the ghost?
16. What do young ghosts call their moms and dads?
17. Where do little ghosts learn to yell “BOO!”?
18. Why are ghosts like newspaper?

Ghost Riddles Answers:

1. Rhythm and boos.
2. To raise their spirits.
3. They boo-t it up!
4. He was a dead-knockout.
5. Bahoo or Yaboo!
6. Boo-ble gum.
7. Boo Genes.
8. To get a booster shot.
9. A cocker-poodle-boo!
10. The Ghost Guard.
11. Fasten your sheet belt.
12. Horror-zontal.
13. Because he didn’t have exact chains.
14. To watch an afterghoul special on TV.
15. Because he didn’t have a haunting license.
16. Transparent.
17. In noisery school.
18. Because they appear in sheets.


Goulish Giggles

Halloween Humor

Q: What did that boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
A: You are the most booooooooo-tiful thing I have ever seen!

Q: What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A: He is mist.

Q: What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A: A sand-witch.

Q: Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
A: Anywhere where he can boo-gie.

Q: What is a vampires favorite holiday?
A: Fangsgiving

Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A: You suck.

Q: What happens when two vampires meet?
A: It was love at first bite!

Q: What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?
A: Ghoul-aid!!!

Q: Why is a ghost such a messy eater?
A: Because he is always a goblin.

Q: Who was the most famous ghost detective?
A: Sherlock Moans.

Q: What do you call two spiders that just got married?
A: Newlywebbed

Q: Why was the girl afraid of the vampire?
A: He was all bite and no bark.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton?
A: Napoleon bone-apart

Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A: At the casketeria.

Q: What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?
A: Mas-scare-a.

Q: Why doesn’t Dracula mind the doctor looking at his throat.

A: Because of the coffin.Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

Q: What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire?
A: A toasty ghosty.

Q: Where do most goblins live?
A: In North and South Scarolina.

Q: What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon.

A: Sour-pussQ: How do you scare a mummy

A: With a yummy dummy in a crash test crummy.Q: Why do vampires scare people?
A: They are bored to death!

Q: What did the ghost say to the man at the coffee shop?
A: Scream or sugar!

Q: Where does a ghost refuel his Porsche?
A: At a ghastly station.

Q: Who was the most famous skeleton detective?
A: Sherlock Bones.

Q: Where did the goblin throw the football?
A: Over the ghoul line.

Q: What instrument do skeleton play?
A: Trom-BONE.

Q: What do ghosts eat for breakfast?
A: Boo-Berries.

Q: Which building does Dracula visit in New York?
A: The Vampire State Building.

Q: What is a Mummy?s favorite type of music?
A: Wrap!!!!!

Q: What tops off a ghost’s ice cream sundae?
A: Whipped scream.

Q: What’s a monster’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.

Q: What do you give a skeleton for valentine’s day?
A: Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.

Q: What do you call a little monsters parents

A: Mummy and deadyQ: What do you get when you cross a vampire with the Internet?
A: Blood-thirsty hacker baby

Q: How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
A: Every night he turns into a bat.

Q: What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A: A grave problem.

Q: Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
A: He had a fang-ache.

Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck.

Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A: All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.

Q: What is a vampires least favorite food?
A: Steak

Q: Why doesn’t anybody like Dracula?
A: He has a bat temper.

Q: What do witches use in their hair?
A: Scare-spray

Q: Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A: So they can keep their ghoulish figures.

Q: Where did the ghost get it’s hair done?
A: At the boo-ty shop.

Q: Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
A: Anywhere where he can boo-gie.

Q: What do they teach in witching school?
A: Spelling.

Q: Why does a witch ride a broom?
A: Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.

Q: Why can’t the boy ghost have babies?
A: Because he has a Hallo-weenie.

Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A: For the Boos.

Q: What are ghosts’ favorite kind of streets?
A: Dead ends

Q: Who does Dracula get letters from?
A: His fang club.

Q: What’s a monsters favorite desert?
A: I-Scream!!

Q: When does a ghost have breakfast?
A: In the moaning.

Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet.

Q: Riddle: the maker does not want it, the buyer does not use it, and the user does not see it, what is it?
A: A coffin.

Q: What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling

Q: What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
A: Coffee with scream and sugar.

Q: Where do ghosts go out?
A: Where they can get boooooo-ze.

Q: Why did the man with a knife in his head cross the street?
A: He was dying to get to the other side!

Q: What do ghosts say when something is really neat?
A: Ghoul

Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To go to the body shop.

Q: How does a girl vampire flirt?
A: She bats her eyes.

Q: Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
A: To stop his coffin.

Q: What can’t you give the headless horseman?
A: A headache.

Q: What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
A: A boo-tie.

Q: What’s a ghosts favorite desert?
A: Boo-berry pie.

Q: Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
A: He didn’t have a haunting license.

Q: Why did the skeleton go disco dancing?
A: To see the boogy man.

Q: Why didn?t the skeleton cross the road?
A: He had no guts.

Q: What did the Mummy movie director say when the final scene was done?
A: OK, that’s a wrap.

Q: How do you keep a monster from biting his nails?
A: Give him screws.

Q: Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A: Mali-boo.

Q: Why can’t Boy Ghosts make babies?
A: Because they have Hollow-Weenies!

Q: What did the mother ghost say to her kids in the car?
A: Fasten your sheet belts.

Q: What do you call two witches living together?
A: Broommates.

Q: What did the corpse’ mom do when her son was bad?
A: Ground him

Q: Why was the mummy so tense?
A: Because he was all wound up.

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton dance at the party?
A: He had no body to dance with.

Q: Why does Dracula wear patent leather shoes?
A: Sandals don’t look good with his tuxedo.

Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.

Q: What is a ghosts favorite sale?
A: A white sale.

Q: Where do ghosts go out?
A: Where they can get sheet-faced.

Q: Why don’t ghost have bands?
A: They get boooooed.

Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath.

Q: What do you call a monster who poisons corn flakes?
A: A cereal killer.

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie?
A: He didn’t have the guts.

Q: Who was the most famous witch detective?
A: Warlock Holmes

Q: What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a skwaush?
A: A squashed pumpkin pie.

Q: Why do ghosts shiver and moan?
A: It’s drafty under that sheet.

Q: What do u get when there is a witch in the desert?
A: You get a sandwich.

Q: Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?
A: It raises their spirits.

Q: What songs does Dracula hate?
A: “You Are My Sunshine” and “Sunshine on my Shoulders.

Q: What?s a ghost’s favorite type of car?
A: A boo-ick

Q: What’s a skeletons favorite part of the house?
A: The living room

Q: What did the bird say on Halloween?
A: Trick or tweet!

Q: What is a vampire?s favorite fruit?
A: A necktarine

Q: Who are some of the werewolves cousins?
A: The whatwolves, the whowolves and the when wolves.

Q: Where do ghost go for fun?
A: To the boo-vies

Q: What do the skeletons say be for eating?
A: Bone appetite

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the Halloween party?
A: Because he had no body to go with.

Q: What did the teenage witch ask her mother on Halloween?
A: Can I have the keys to the broom tonight.

Q: How did the ghost say goodbye to the vampire?
A: So long sucker!

Q: Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights?
A: He’s all bone & no muscle.

Q: What’s a Vampire’s least favorite song?
A: Another one bites the dust!

Q: What is a Skeleton’s favorite song.

A: Bad to the BoneQ: What do ghosts call there girl friends?
A: There goul friends.

Q: Why are vampires like false teeth?
A: They all come out at night.

Q: What was the mummies’ vacation like?
A: Nobody knows. They were too wrapped up to tell us.

Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.

Q: What kind of key does a skeleton use?
A: A skeleton key.

Q: Why do skeletons drink milk?
A: To help their bones!

Q: What did the goblin say to the witch?
A: I don’t know you tell me!

Q: What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes?
A: They suck! (or they bite!)